Season 5

November 19, 2000

Bobby rejects Thanksgiving after history lessons from John Redcorn, who longs to be a real father to his illegitimate son Joseph.

November 26, 2000

The Booster Club sends a distraught Hank to talk to Peggy after she fails the football team's star fullback and gets him suspended from the team.

December 3, 2000

Cash-flow problems plague Hank's father, who's forced to work a menial job on Veterans Day instead of marching in the parade.

December 10, 2000

Bobby goes all-out to become school mascot, a high-profile post that suffers a low blow when he avoids a time-honored tradition.

December 17, 2000

Bill counters his holiday loneliness by becoming a generous Santa, attracting a nice single mother and a young slacker who takes advantage.

January 21, 2001

Peggy thinks Hank's tears are indicative of a father-son void, but they're really about his truck, which looks headed for pickup-truck heaven.

February 4, 2001

While a distraught Hank tries to deal with the fact that he wasn't born in Texas, Cotton and his buddies once again make plans to assassinate Fidel Castro.

February 11, 2001

Bill and former Texas governor Ann Richards hit it off after a chance meeting resulting from Hank's reluctant prank in an Austin hotel.

February 18, 2001

Bobby's ventriloquist's dummy gets more of Hank's attention than Bobby, but it's Dale who harbors a grudge against the wooden being.

February 25, 2001

Unaware that the new employee at Strickland Propane is a prostitute, Peggy becomes her best friend and even offers her a place to stay--Hank's den.

March 4, 2001

Repeated exposure to poisons forces Dale out of extermination and into a desk job that leads him back into extermination--of careers.

March 11, 2001

As Luanne's sponsor in a sexual-abstinence program, Peggy has to testify about her lifetime total of sexual partners--and it's more than one.

April 1, 2001

When Bobby develops an allergy to Ladybird, Hank builds a doghouse, an elaborate accommodation that's perfect--for Bobby.

April 8, 2001

Hank joins Bobby's environmental effort, but only to preserve a long-time cover-up concerning a mishap with Boomhauer's car in high school.

April 22, 2001

Dale plans to buy Nancy a face-lift by suing a tobacco company, which countersues--and carelessly bugs his home.

May 6, 2001

Wearing a prosthetic rump relieves Hank's back pain, but makes him the butt of friends' jokes as they all prepare for a riding-mower race.

May 13, 2001

Bobby avoids a beating by high schoolers by pretending to be one of them.